GNW: Dasher, we are only 2 days out from Christmas and you’re here at St. Nick’s Tavern for Happy Hour. Is this the best way to prepare for the big day?
Dasher: What difference does it make? Whether or not I perform well on Christmas Day is irrelevant. Everyone knows it’s all about Rudolph. He gets all the media attention. He gets to front Santa’s sleigh. The rest of us are nothing compared to him.
GNW: Do I detect a hint of jealousy?
Dasher: There’s no jealousy. There’s just facts. Ever since that Christmas Day where Rudolph saved the day, reindeer like me have become an afterthought. You know, there was a time when people used to talk and sing songs about me.
GNW: Really? As I recall, there’s no Dasher Christmas song.
Dasher: Dr. Dre was producing it before Rudolph came around. Then he dropped the project and produced that Rudolph song that everyone loves. Now my days are spent here at this bar drinking my sorrows away, reminiscing about the days that were.
GNW: Rudolph’s inclusion to the reindeer corps has really appeared to hit you hard. Do all the other reindeer have this big of an issue with it?
Dasher: Nah, it’s just me. I’m the one who had to make all the sacrifices. I had to give up my spot at the front of the sleigh. I’m the one who lost out on the Dr. Dre song. I’m the one who had it all taken from him.
GNW: Does Rudolph know how you feel about this?
Dasher: Yeah he knows, but what does he care? He’s the most famous Reindeer of all Time. He single handily brings in more revenue for Santa Claus than the rest of the reindeer put together. He was in Forbes Magazines list of Top 500 Richest People in the World. His life is perfect. It’s mine that’s suffering.
GNW: I’m sorry to hear that Dasher. However on a much more positive note, it appears Harperkids Entertainment (the company that brought us the 100% official Justin Bieber biography) have agreed to write a biography on you called “Dasher: Reindeer World 2.0”. What are your thoughts on that?
Dasher: I can’t wait! In all my years as a reindeer I’ve seen it all. I got the inside scoop on Santa Claus, the elves, and all the other reindeer. We expect the book to become a New York Times Best Seller and I will be doing a worldwide book tour starting in January to help promote it.
GNW: Life appears to be on the ups for you Dasher! Best of luck this holiday season and we can’t wait to read your new book!
Dasher: Thanks! I’ll send you over a signed copy once it’s released.
Tune in tomorrow as we sit down with Rudolph in our last installment of the Reindeer Series.